The Zarlin Catacombs

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This article is about the Season 1 Campaign. For the Location, see Zarlin Catacombs.

Season 1
Air Date: August 29th, 2015
The Zarlin Catacombs
Kobold Headhunters
The New Crew

The Zarlin Catacombs is the eighth official Campaign of URealms Live and it aired on August 29th, 2015. In the campaign, a group of Gnome treasure hunters explore an ancient ruin of the ancient Beenu called The Zarlin Catacombs.



Character Race Class Player
Bromas Gnome Icon.png No-Eye Bromas Gnome/Kobold Paladin Coestar
Fantastico Fabioso Concubine Icon.png Fantastico Fabioso Keen Paladin Roamin
Morgana Marie Icon.png Morgana Marie/Morgan Marie Gnome Magician Deadbones
Sergio Fabioso Male Icon.png Sergio Fabioso Gnome/Elf (temporarily) Rouge Justin


Character Race Class
Raynel Icon.png Raynel Keen Paladin
Prism Prism Gemling None
Glamourshark Icon.png Glamourous Glamourshark/Divine Being Unknown
Alfie Alfie Beenu Unknown
Unnamed Resurrected Beenu Unnamed Resurrected Beenu Beenu Unknown
Franky Rosebud Franky Rosebud Gnome Berserker
Elemech Icon.png Unnamed Elemech Elemech Unknown

Battle Encounters[edit]

Plot Summary[edit]

The adventure begins with them all climbing down into the dungeon. First down is the leader No-Eye Bromas with his squire Raynel. Morgana Marie follows, having come along as a tourist. Last comes Sergio Fabioso and his 'special friend' Fantastico Fabioso. Morgana ends up appealing the group with a show of Call Mjollnir, before they head into the dungeon. After stumbling on a stone that seems to 'activate' the dungeon, they come across 3 Robots. Sergio and Fantastico try to talk with them, but the robots attack. No matter what the group throw at the robots though, they seem to shrug it off. Sergio ends up finding a Mechasurfer in the rubble, and an odd 4th robot appears that seems to be able to transmute items. Eventually, they wear the robots down.

As the last robot falls, Fantastico, who was strangled by it, wakes up with Mind Fist. They find a large door, but cannot find a way to open it. However, as they search the area, Morgana ends up finding an opening. They arrive in a room full of treasure, so they fill their bags. As they continue onword, they find an arrow trap. Sergio tests it with his Mechasurfer, while Morgana uses Honor Chains and Call Earthlord to disable the last one. When they make it to the other side, Bromas is hammered in the face by an apple, thrown by an apologetic bear Franky Rosebud, who they then reason with. Fantastico's new wench tries one of the apples, to be hurt in disgust over Morgana's words as she pockets 10, causing Fantastico to let the wench free by smashing the vase she came out of. Morgana uses Spirit Vessel on a random skeleton nearby, who is very confused. He calls himself Alfie, and reveals he is a Beenu. She revives another, but in their confusion, they are too freaked out to help, so she lets them go.

Suddenly, they see the bear being chased by an Unnamed Elemech. Fantastico wants to help the bear, but Sergio accidentally shoots and kills the bear, causing the Elemech to become friendly. However, between Sergio's sexual advances, as well as the threatening from Bromas, the mech attacks. When Sergio kisses it's fist, it vanishes, only to continue the attack from invisibility. They corner him, and he distracts them with a Gemling to spare his life, before fleeing the scene. Morgana adopts the little gem, naming it Prism, and it opens the door up ahead. As they debate on whether to go ahead or not, Fabioso trys to charm all the other party members with Infautation. The girls break free, but Bromas seems to still be attracted to Fantastico. Sergio asks Fantastico what they wish to do, leading all of a sudden to freedom for the concubine. Bromas' Pot Puppy, named Steven (he had found back in treasure room) runs up ahead and Raynel follows as suddenly, 3 robots wake up. As the doors close, Raynel runs out.

As the robots fire beams around, the party continues fighting, regardless of the random beams changing them, their abilities, and their treasures. In the end, Morgana had become a male (renamed Morgan), Sergio had become a female Noble Born Elf, and Bromas had become a Kobold. As they are rather confused, in which Morgan and Sergio contemplate a relationship, but now sealed in this room, Morgan tries to convince his little Gemling Prism to open the door. Suddenly, Bromas is overcome by his Cursed Muddy Billhook as Gorgons come from the wall, leading his army of Gemlings he had spawned as well as the Gorgons into attacking the party, as suddenly a hole opens in the ceiling and water starts pouring into the room. Fantastico, noticing something off with Bromas, proceeds to unleash his Hurricane Bracer, blowing away a ton of the army and snapping Bromas back to normal. Suddenly, a Glamourous shark shows up, talks to Fantastico as well as the party, in which they befriend it, as it realizes its friends are all dead, but agrees to help them get out after eating the few remaining Gorgons. Suddenly, the walkie-talkie that Fantastico found on the robots springs to life, Raynel on the other end, who hears the issue and goes to get help. They break the hatch open, and the shark flies up, opening the door. As they all dash through, picking up Prism and the pot-puppy, they all neglect to help the sole surviving Gorgon, even though they spot his Tambok Ticket.

All they find is a statue and a deep crevasse, but they get a walkie-talkie call from Raynel, who tells them if they can make it across the crevasse, she has a way out, as well as confesses her love for Bromas. She goes to grab rope, and as they begin to head out, when all of a sudden they are attacked by the Beenu Warmachine. Bromas accidentally loses his puppy in the battle, as Morgan and Sergio get grappled in its hands. Fantastico is able to find out that the body is invincible, so they start focusing its hands, freeing Sergio. Morgan cast Earthquake out of his hat, causing a large bolder above them to collapse, squishing the mech into the pit as well as falling into it himself. However, the mech still hangs on with Morgan clinging on for dear life to jump off. Fantastico uses his Monocle of Magic Sight to figure out that they have to destroy each hand before they can hit the body, yet oddly the fruit that Morgan throws at it seems to short-circuit the force field protecting it. They continue attacking it, and after Morgan resurrects the Pot Puppy with a Soul Puppet, the machine retreats, but a spiteful Morgan ends up slipping into the abyss as he tries to throw the rest of his apples at it. As the remaining 3 return to Raynel, she is shocked at their new forms. Although Sergio finds a stone to change someone back to their old form (as well as a Tambok Ticket), he uses it on himself, prompting Raynel to ask him out, moving on from her former crush.

Lore Established[edit]

Major Lore[edit]

  • The events of this campaign are played out.
  • All of the characters listed above are introduced, most notably Bromas and Raynel.
  • The following beast species are introduced: Gorgon.
  • Beenu are established.
    • It is established that Beenu are extinct. [Citation needed]
      • Although Beenu are extinct, it is established that they can be revived through soul puppets.
  • Elemechs and the Beenu War Machine are introduced.
  • It is possible for one's race, abilities, and sex to be changed by an external force.
  • The Tower of Ultimate Wizardry and the Zarlin Catacombs are established.
  • The Grand Paladin Order is established.
    • All of the player characters (except Morgana Marie) and Raynel are established as members of the Grand Paladin Order at the time of this campaign.
    • The first appearance of the Grand Paladin Order was in The Many Gobos of Pat, but as that campaign was retconned, this campaign marks the first canonical appearance of the order.
  • Morgana Marie and Franky Rosebud die.

Minor Lore[edit]

  • Boyfriend Quest is officially canonized.
  • The Book of Faces are introduced, as showcased by Morgana.

Timeline Placement[edit]

Episode Guide[edit]

Title Airdate
Character Creation - Episode 0 Aug 28, 2015
Episode 1 Aug 30, 2015
Episode 2 Aug 30, 2015
Episode 3 Aug 31, 2015
Episode 4 Aug 31, 2015
Episode 5 Sep 1, 2015
Episode 6 Sep 1, 2015
Episode 7 Sep 2, 2015
Episode 8 Sep 2, 2015
Episode 9 Sep 3, 2015
Finale - Episode 10 Sep 3, 2015
Behind the Scenes Sep 4, 2015
Campaign Playlist

See Also[edit]

Supporter Events[edit]

Main Page: Supporter Events